Twilight: How I’m Like The Cullen Family

May 25, 2015

cullens1I never thought that I would enjoy the Twilight movies. One of my roommates had been trying to get me to watch them for some time and I finally got around to it. I have not read the books. We watched the whole series in a week. It surprised me that I actually really enjoyed them.

For those who haven’t read the books or watched the films, here is what you need to know for my blog to make any sense. It is the story of Bella Swon. Her parents have separated. After years of living with her Mother she moves up to Washington State to live with her father. At her new school she meets and falls for a guy named Edward Cullen. She discovers he is a vampire but is not afraid of him. She soon becomes friends with the Cullen family. The father figure is a Doctor and he and his family believe that killing humans and drinking their blood is wrong. They are considered “vegetarians” in the vampire world as they only drink the blood of animals. Not many vampire take the stance that the Cullen family have. Bella and Edward marry and he turns her into a vampire upon her request.

The thing I loved about this movie the first time around was how Bella immersed herself, as much as possible, in the Cullen family. They were a bit unsure at first as I’m sure no one had ever tried to befriend them on that level before. Bella won them over. It reminded me of when I was living in the Philippine Islands as a missionary. I had to immerse myself in the lifestyle and culture of the people to become one of them just like Bella did with the Cullen family.

Recently I decided to re-watch the saga. As I was watching it God showed me that I was somewhat like the Cullen Family. As vampires, their instinct is to drink the blood of humans. Most vampires didn’t think twice about this but the Cullen’s have chosen to go against their instincts and the rest of the vampire race and re-train themselves. With will power and the help of their family, they fight the urge to drink the blood of humans. There was a scene in the films when Bella cut herself and started to bleed and when she was having her baby and she bleed in front of the family. It clearly affected the newer members of the Cullen family. The older members had to get them out of the room and help them through the spell that had clearly taken them over.

Likewise I have chosen to deny the way I feel and what society is telling me and not give in to my homosexual desires. I have chosen to believe what the Bible has to say and with God’s help and my support system, I am learning to fight my sexual desires. I’m in the process of re-training my desires. Don’t be fooled, this is not an easy process but sanctification rarely is. I make lots of mistakes but God is faithful and gives me grace to walk it out. God never promised that it would be easy but He did promise that He would be there for me.

The Cullen Family were not born vampires but through situations in life they were turned. I believe it is the same for those in the LGBT community. We have a devil that is hell bent on destroying us and what God has made. I didn’t choose to my homosexual thoughts and feelings but I do have a choice. What matters is what I do with that choice. I can give into my desires and live for myself or I can choose to die to my flesh and live for God despite of how I feel. God does not promise to take away our sexual desires. After all He made us to be sexual creatures. We will always face temptation on this side of heaven. I can be doing well and then without warning I see someone or something and just like the Cullen family seeing Blood, temptation takes over and I can’t see straight. Learning to die to ourself is a hard processes especially if we are not used to keeping our minds and actions in check. We also need a loving support system of people that we can run to and confess our failure. People that will not judge but will encourage and support us. It doesn’t matter how many times we fall. What matters is we get back up and continue the fight. We may have to stay away from specific movies and books as they can flare up our sexual appetites. In today’s day and age it is almost impossible to stay away from temptation. It is all around. If we take in things that are impure, then our life will be impure but if we take in things that are pure then our life will be pure. The Bible says in Philippians 4:8 NLT:

Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right and pure, and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”

God is not an angry tyrant waiting for us to make once false step so He can get us. He knows and loves us more than we can possibly understand. He came to earth to die a horrible death on a cross because He loves us. He is patient and kind. Hebrews 4:15 says He understands everything we feel and desire. He is not surprised by our temptations or failures. He knows what is in our hearts better than we know. My first instinct when I have given into my desires is to hide and try to clean myself up before coming to God. What I am learning is that I don’t have the ability to make myself clean. If I did, then He wouldn’t have had to come die on the cross. The Bible, in Hebrews 10:19, says that we can enter His courts with boldness. He loves us too much to leave us broken and wallowing in our own mess. He is the only one who can clean us up and make us new again. We need to run to Him so He can wash us.

In John Chapter 6: 47-58 after feeding the 5,000, Jesus tells the people that unless you feast on my flesh and drink my blood, you can not have eternal life. And later at the last supper He made a covenant with His people (us) and commanded that we take communion as a remembrance of what He did on the cross for us. Just like vampires we feast on His flesh and drink His Blood (Matthew 26:27-28) which he poured out for us.

I want to leave you with these lyrics from Pam Thum’s song “Will You Come To Jesusfrom the album “Faithful”:

Will you come to Jesus, will you open up your heart. Will you let his love surround you, you can come just as you are. You’ll find Peace forever and shelter in his arms. Will you come to Jesus with your heart.”


The Willis Clan’s New Album “Heaven”

May 17, 2015

1483478_792635450823784_7460199499494476003_oMany of you have probably heard me talk about The Willis Clan before. For those of you who don’t know who they are, here is a brief summery about them.

They are a family band based just outside of Nashville, TN. There are 12 kids in the family but only 7 of the kids are in the band. They have been called the modern day Von Trapp family. They are all very talented. They write all their own music and older kids teach the younger kids the over 80 musical instruments in their house. They are homeschooled as well. The boys have been taught to wrestle and complete as their father was a wrestler in his youth. They are also award winning dancers and have competed across the country. These days they focus more on their music. They are regular guests at the Grand Ole Opry and have competed on The Voice. They currently have their own show “The Willis Family” on TLC. Catch their show on Tuesdays nights at 10 PM (9 PM central).

I discovered them about 3 years ago, when I found their first CD at a local music store. I love Celtic music and the Celtic cross, on the front cover, caught my eye. I decided to give it a try. It was one of the best purchases I have ever made. I fell in love with their music from the moment I first listened to them. I have eagerly purchased each of there CD’s as they have become available. This new one is no exception. Monday, they are set to release their brand new album “Heaven” on iTunes. It’s not too late to pre-order your copy today.

I had the privileged of attending their album release party down town Nashville last Monday (May 11th). It was a lot of fun. TLC was there filming for the TV show so keep a close eye out on the episode that features the release party. You may find me in the crowd. I was the only one that had on a Willis Clan T-shirt. I have only had the opportunity to see them once before. It was last year at a park in Ashland City, TN near where they live (see photo below). If you get an opportunity to see them live, I would highly recommend it. This is not something you want to pass up. They put on a very entertaining show.

I would call The Willis Clan a Celtic band. Their first album “Chapter One: Roots” is considered traditional Irish music. Their second album “Chapter Two: Boots” is mixture between Celtic and Bluegrass music. Funny how close the two intertwine. Their third and latest album “Heaven” is considered Celtic Pop. It is another amazing collection of songs. I have enjoyed all their albums and this one is no exception. They have earned their right to be in my top 5 favorites.

My all time favorite song from The Willis Clan is “Fair Weather Love” written by Jessica Willis who is also the lead singer for the band. This song first appeared on their second album “Chapter Two: Boots”. They cut a newer version for the album “Heaven”. Both versions are amazing. My favorite song from “Heaven” is “Bitter Cold”.

They are currently working on a music video for their new song “City That I’m Looking For” which will hopefully be out soon. Keep an eye out for that.

I have an older stereo in my car and I can not plug in my iPod. So I like to make collection CDs, that I keep in my car, for my favorite musicians and groups. Here is the list of songs that I choose for The Willis Clan CD. It was hard to narrow down the final list as they have so many amazing songs to choose from. I have listed the song title and which album the song can be found on. Consider purchasing their music library and support this amazing band. Go to iTunes to hear the sound clips for these songs.

  1. The Traveling Song from Chapter One: Roots
  2. What Can I Say from Chapter Two: Boots
  3. Chasing Love from Heaven
  4. Lonely Castle William Set from Chapter One: Roots
  5. Slow Me Down from Chapter Two: Boots
  6. Now or Never from Heaven
  7. Jack B from Chapter One: Roots
  8. Fair Weather Love from Chapter Two: Boots
  9. Carried Away from Heaven
  10. The Rambler from Chapter One: Roots
  11. Since I Left Home from Chapter Two: Boots
  12. Ship On The Line from Chapter One: Roots
  13. Come With Me from Heaven
  14. Lottie Lies Among The Flowers from Chapter One: Roots
  15. Sadie from Chapter Two: Boots
  16. Bitter Cold from Heaven
  17. The Wounded Crow from Chapter One: Roots
  18. Heaven from Heaven




January 19, 2015

scan0176I know I said that the last post was my last but with a rise in posts over the suicide of Leelah Alcorn, I wanted to address this issue.

Over the last couple months, I have seen a rise in comments and stories about transgender.

Recently a boy, Leelah Alcorn, committed suicide because his “Christian” parents would not accept him as a girl. There was an article that attacked Christians for not accepting transgender as a legitimate identity insisting that if Christians do not accept this mindset, they should no longer be allowed to be parents. Everything I read suggested that these parents were loving and accepting but could not accept their son’s transgender feelings.

Recently I heard that transgenders are being allowed to use the bathrooms of their choice. So, where does it stop? What is to stop a pedophile from going into a bathroom by saying that they’re transgender?

Our society is well on the road to accepting the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender) community as an identity that can’t be changed. We are told to embrace it.

What is the next fight? Will we have pedophiles peeking through the curtain? NAMBLA (North American Man/Boy Love Association) has been fighting to get the age of legal sex dropped for years. They will claim the same thing. “I was born this way and I can’t change.” How long before society starts accepting that? Some say it will never happen but that’s what was said about the LGBT community 20 to 30 years ago. Our society is on slippery slope that will not be easy to get off of.

What doesn’t make sense to me is why a loving God would make a boy and put him in a girls body or make a girl and put her in a boys body. God says that He is love. He even came down and died a brutal death so we could be free. We need to also remember that there is a devil out there that is hell bent on destroying anyone and everyone he can.

I do not profess to be an expert on this subject nor do I have all the answers. I have a lot of love and compassion for the sexually broken. What I have to say is based from my own story…the things that I have learned and come to understand. Some may disagree but it is clear to me that the root of the transgender issue is that their masculinity or femininity most likely was not affirmed. I can’t say that this is the case for everyone but it certainly was in my life.

As a child, I dealt with gender confusion. I never really fit in with guys and had an easier time fitting in with girls. I can remember being in elementary school wishing I were a girl. Most of my parent’s friends, who had kids my age, were girls. I used to dress up in dresses and play with dolls. My Mom allowed it for a time as she said it is somewhat normal for boys to be curious about such things, but once she realized it was more then just normal curiosity, she encouraged other forms of playing that didn’t involve dresses and dolls. I am in the picture on the back row, all the way to the left. I am wearing a dress in this photo.

As I got older and hit puberty, the attraction to men started. I remember feeling like I was sitting on a fence with a leg on the male side and a leg on the female side and not really belonging anywhere. That is a scary place to be. It made me an easy target especially in junior high school. Jesus has healed much of my heart from the ridicule that I endured from kids at school and youth group.

After graduating high school, I became a missionary in the Philippines with Youth With A Mission. While in their Discipleship Training School, I remember opening up about my struggle to one of our speakers who prayed for me. There isn’t a defining moment that I can pin point to say it was on that day, but God helped me off that fence and I have not returned.

I believe that my gender confusion was in part, if not all, due to the fact that I didn’t really bond with my Dad. From my recollection, he was emotionally absent. He has told me that he was never comfortable with the girly things I did as a kid. I must point out here that we did have some wonderful times together.

When I was in the ex-gay live in program, the Lord showed me that I had put up a fence around my Mom, but I had shut my Dad outside the fence. God showed me through this vision that I had rejected my masculinity. I still don’t know what the events are that led me to that decision. I may never know. My healing and growth process has not been easy but whose is?

I had actually forgotten about this part of my testimony until a couple of months ago when God reminded me of it. I guess since I haven’t dealt with it in so long, I forgot it is a vital part of my story.

I do not believe it is healthy for parents to accept this behavior and act like nothing is wrong. My life is proof that one can be healed. I realize that this is a very delicate situation and needs to be handled with much love, understanding and prayer. I’m so thankful my Mom didn’t leave me to my tendencies and push me to embrace them.
We don’t have to stay stuck. God can take our life and change it around to something beautiful. We just have to let him. It is not an easy process but it is worth fighting for!

Thank you for allowing me to share my heart and thoughts. So many are sharing and speaking about these issues who don’t have a horse in the race. Since I do, I have been wanting to share my perspective. Thanks for all the love on both sides of the issue. To think that someone could be blessed by something that has been a source of embarrassment and shame my whole life. Only God can do that.

Thank you Jerry Bryant for editing all these posts for me. This is the 5th post in this series.



Common Mistakes Christians Make When Talking To Gay People

January 16, 2015

1910563_42399720812_4089_nFor my last post in this series of posts, I wanted to talk about some of the mistakes Christians make when talking to Gay people or anybody for that matter who is not saved.
Jesus said in John 13:35 that the world will know we are Christians by our love for one another. Today it seems that the world knows we are Christians by what we stand against, so it’s no surprise why no one wants be a Christian anymore. Some Christians are seriously misrepresenting God in the world today. People already feel like God is only a tyrant who wants to make our lives miserable, but we need to show them the truth. I’m not saying you can’t have an opinion or stand up for our beliefs. What I am saying is we need to be showing more love, because right now most people only see anger, hatred & judgment.
Some Christians seem to feel that they need to share their view that homosexuality is a sin whenever they meet or are talking to gay people. Here’s a tip. The moment you say you are a Christian, they’ll know how you feel about homosexuality. You don’t need to say it. What they really want to know is if you take the Bible seriously and if you will love them. Many gay people have only known rejection when it comes to Church.
Some Christians feel like they are compromising or condoning gay people’s lifestyle if they don’t say anything about it. Even I have had to fight that feeling at times. We’re making the classic mistake of trying to win an argument of who is right and who is wrong, rather then loving the person. That persons sex life is really none of anybody’s business. It is between them and Go and it is our place to love them and show them how much God loves them. No one wants their “sin” thrown in their faces. No one. I seriously doubt that has ever brought about any fruit. What that actually does is lets that person know to never discuss anything that with you again.
Once I was talking to a guy that I had just met and I am not sure how it came up, but I ended up telling him that I lived with 2 women. He immediately assumed that I was having a sexual relationship with them and proceeded to point out the error of my ways. I was pretty upset because it was none of his business and he didn’t have all the facts.
Here’s another tip. You have to earn the persons respect before you have the right to speak into their life. They need to know you are a safe person that they can open up to and that you won’t judge them.
I have some openly gay friends that know my stance and I know theirs. We don’t agree on the issue but we are able to remain friends because of our mutual love and respect for one another. From time to time we talk about it but it doesn’t cause an issue. I pray that God will show them to truth. If I’m constantly pointing out that I think they are living in sin, that door will close.
In all our relationships, we need to pray for people and allow God to bring the revelation. Only God can change their heart and life and when that moment comes, they will remember you and remember that you didn’t judge them or condemn them. They may even come knocking because they saw your love and know you genuinely care for them.
We need to ask ourselves what is our motivation for sharing this stuff. If it is not out of love then you have no business doing it. If it is out of love, ask yourself how you would receive a word from someone if the tables were turned. Also ask God to open their hearts and let you know when the time is right to speak into their lives. It is about mutual love and respect. Also be open. I have learned some lessons myself from some of my non Christian friends & family.
I say that this is my last post in this series but I actually have one more so stay tuned.


Is Ex-Gay Therapy good?

January 7, 2015

1930452_34913840812_2424_nThere has been a lot of bad press recently on ex-gay therapy. Exodus International (once the largest umbrella ministry for those wanting freedom from their same sex attractions) closed its doors in 2013. It appears that much of the leadership have denounced their involvement in ex-gay therapy and are now living gay lives. There is also over-whelming complaints from people crying “abuse” & citing horrific experiences in ex-gay type therapy. These things continue to tell the world that change is not possible; it is cruel and damaging to expect change.

I can’t say that these people did not have bad experiences. There has been a lot of damage done in the church under the name of therapy, even with good intentions. People can jump into counseling or try to help out when in truth they have no idea what they are doing. Things are hurried and not done right. We are all human and we all make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes have negative lasting effects on others.

I have heard stories of practices and methods used in ex-gay therapy as well as live-in programs that I do not agree with and am I’m thankful that God led me to the right place. My experience in an ex-gay live in program was a good experience! I got a lot out of it.

Before I go on, you need to realize we are living in a world where no one wants to be inconvenienced. Everything is “all about I and living a life that pleases # 1”. People do not seem to want to do anything that is hard or challenging.

In 2001, I moved to California and entered an ex-gay live-in program. With any recovery-based live-in program there is some structure and rules that can seem harsh at first, but the longer you are there the more freedom you are given.

The goal of the live-in program that I went to (and I believe it should be the goal of all ex-gay based therapy) was not to make gay people straight.

I know that this may be a shock to most. As Sy Rogers, my favorite ex-gay speaker, once said, “The goal is not to become straight as straight people go to hell too”.

The goal is to get people’s lives right with God. Everything else is brought to the light through that. When our relationship is right with God, He is free to work in us and change us.

The program I was in was basically discipleship. We talked about how to deal with temptation and other sexual issues, but the heart of it was basic discipleship. We learned how about and practiced having a devotion time. We learned about forgiveness, studying the Bible & a ton of other things. We also read a lot of great books. Counseling was available from local counselors for those who wanted to deal with issues from their past.

Some people’s sexual attractions are instantly taken away by a miraculous touch from God. Everyone coming into the program hopes for that, but those cases are rare. Most of the time people, who have had any lasting change, have had to work at it. It is not an easy process, which is why so few do it or give up.

I would see 25 to 30 men enter the program. Some came with the illusion that they would be changed but when the reality hit that they actually have to put forth the effort to actually change, they left feeling they had been cheated or that the program didn’t work.

If God instantly took away our issues we would learn nothing. It is through fighting our temptations and choosing to replace old habits with new healthy habits that we learn to fight and are better equipped to face life and the temptations & struggles that come along the way.

Anyone who has been promised that his or her sexual attractions will go away, have been misinformed. This can happen & does, but God may choose to never take them away.

Being married isn’t proof of healing or change either. There are lots of gay people married that still struggle with their homosexuality. There are some ex-gay leaders that, after years of marriage, have divorced their wives and decided to live a gay life. I have also seen people go through these programs and then decide to go back to their old life.

There is no judgment here. It is not an easy, road but with God it is possible. As I have said before, I may never see the change that I want but I trust that God is in control and I am happy serving Him and following Him. I don’t feel that I’m being deprived of anything or missing out on anything. I have no desire to be married and I love my life and being single. I am happy with friendships, family, my job and music. God continues to use Philippians 1:6 as well as a number of songs to strengthen me. If you want a list of the songs that encourage me, email me at joshuadinman@gmail.com.

I have 1 more post in this series of posts that I will be sharing. Probably next week. Stay tuned.


My Beliefs

January 2, 2015

1654188_10152655529910813_3629451271479439721_nI get a lot of questions and comments from people when they learn my story so I thought I would share here with you what I believe for anyone who cares to read.
I realize that many people don’t understand me or the stance I take. They don’t understand why I have chosen an ex-gay life. I thought I would take some time to layout my belief system and why I believe what I do.
First off, you need to know that I believe in the Bible. I believe that it is the inspired word of God. Some people believe that it was written for a specific time and place. I do not believe this. I believe that it is still relevant and applicable today.
There are things that I don’t always understand and grey areas, which is why there is so much controversy over many issues. I believe in Jesus, that he is the Son of God and I believe in the Holy Spirit. I believe that God is Love and that His commands were put into place to help us and not harm us.
Growing up in a church in America, I was that taught the importance of obeying God’s and his commands and was encouraged to have a personal relationship with God. I believe that this comes through a personal relationship with God and that we are saved. I don’t believe that we can save ourselves because if we could, there would have been no reason for Him to come die on the cross. I am completely dependent on Him. Without Him, I would live to gratify sinful desires.
I also believe there is a devil and he is hell bent on destroying my relationship with God. If you don’t believe this, then we will most likely not see eye to eye and you may not want to continue reading. Honestly, I’ve always had a close connection with God and have had some amazing experiences that have sustained me through much of my life.
I also have same sex attractions. I never chose to feel this way but for whatever reason (I do not know what caused this) it has happened. I don’t believe that I was born gay. Even as a kid that idea didn’t make sense to me.
In Genesis, the Bible says that everything God made was good. Starting in Leviticus, God has not been shy in His disapproval of homosexuality. So if all of what God made was good, then how come He condemns homosexuality?
What this tells me is that He didn’t make it and if He didn’t make it, then we are not born gay. Look at our bodies. It is plainly obvious that even the design of our bodies was made for 1 male & 1 female.
Why would God make us gay and then condemn us for it? It makes no sense. If you study the Bible and see the depth of His love, you would see this goes against His very character.
So what causes homosexuality? I don’t have any answers to this. I don’t believe anyone does. The only factor that I see is that most (not all) gay people have in common is that they were molested or abused when they were children. This is not the cause of homosexuality but it is a very common trait. It certainly doesn’t help the situation, especially if one is dealing with gender confusion.
I don’t know if I was ever molested. I have no memory of it. I believe that circumstances and things happen that make people vulnerable to certain things. Also, the devil is great at exploiting things.
I do not believe there is a gay gene or that there is a demon of homosexuality that I have been stricken by. Everyone has an issue that they deal with and so I don’t blame God for my issues. For me, if it weren’t homosexuality, it would be something else. It is part of life.
In the classic movie “The African Queen”, Katharine Hepburn has a line that I love. She says “Nature is what we are put in this world to overcome.”
No, I don’t believe God hates me because I am attracted to men. I believe that God loves and understands me. Hebrews 4:15 say that Jesus was tempted in all ways.
I don’t believe that because I am attracted to men that I am sinning. Again I never choose to be attracted to the same sex. Who would choose that? I believe that is why most people claim they were born gay. I believe the choice comes in when we choose either to give into to the temptation or choose to die to our fleshly desires and obey God. It is no different for straight guys. God has commanded that we save ourselves from sexual pleasure till marriage. Temptation and struggle it isn’t wrong. Everyone is tempted but it is a choice whether to act on it or wait.
In Matthew 16:24 Jesus told us to deny ourselves and follow Him. To give into my temptations and live a gay lifestyle would be the opposite of denying myself. It would be me gratifying my fleshly desires.
The gay community wants the world to believe that they are born gay so they don’t have to take responsibility for their actions. They may be fooling the world but God is not fooled. Like everything else, I believe that God can redeem us and change us so that we don’t have to be gay. 1 Corinthians 6: 9-11 says, “Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive or cheat people-none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God. Some of you were once like that. But you have were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of God”.
To me the implication is clear. You were once like that, but not anymore, which shows change is possible.
I have hard all the arguments that the gay community has regarding the verses of the Bible on homosexuality and it doesn’t make sense to me. They say that God was talking about abusive or oppressive relationships and not about loving gay relationships. The Bible doesn’t actually say that. No matter what we do, we can’t justify our sin. It is dangerous live our life the way we want to on our terms and expect God to bless it.
Some say that it is unfair that a gay person has to give up their sexual desires to please God. It might be unfair but life is unfair. Couldn’t we also say that a diabetic’s life is unfair? They have to live a tedious life constantly checking their insulin levels. Not being able to eat whatever they want. They never asked for that or chose that life.
Sometimes bad things happen to good people. It is just life. It is what we do with that life that matters. For me choosing to live a life by God’s word is the same. It is tedious at times but God gives us strength to do what is right.
What do we do then? What is the answer? Turn to Jesus who loves you and understands you more than you could possibly imagine. He can cleanse you and restore your relationship between you and God. He is not an angry tyrant waiting for you to do something wrong so he can punish you. He is a loving Father that longs to bless you and love you, if you will just open up to Him and give Him your life. His commands are to give you a better life, not to make you miserable.
We can never do it by ourselves alone. In my journey I had to get to the point where if my sexual desires never changed, I would be content. I deeply desire for Jesus to take away my attractions to men but if it doesn’t happen this side of heaven, then I am content in trusting Him. He knows what he is doing.
Recently God showed me that in accepting this, I have plateaued and stopped chasing after change. It was time for me to quit wasting time by continue to fight for change.
The verse in the Bible that I have always held on to has become my life verse. Philippians 1:6 “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”
That verse has brought me so much encouragement over the years.
I hope this helps you better understand what I believe and me. I am open to talking about any of this so if you have any questions, let me know.


Celebrate with Me!!

December 20, 2014

179824_10150132216470813_2659547_nYou may or may not know that I struggle with Homosexuality. I’m pretty open about it and have shared my story freely with people over the years. The other day I was sharing with a co-worker and realized something. I have only fooled around with one person in my life. The last time was in 1998. That was 16 years ago!! I haven’t thought about it much over the years but this is a huge victory that I want to celebrate! Thank you Lord for your faithfulness.Now I can not say that I have remained sexually pure for 16 years as I have had an addiction to porn for a number of years. Addiction is a funny thing. I can go months without it and then sometimes I can’t go a day without it. Crazy. I draw strength from the Steve Camp song that says “I know someday I will be free. The weight of sin will be released but for now He covers me.” A buddy and I are going through a study at the beginning of the year about living pure in a sexually driven culture. I plan to share more on the are of homosexuality and my thoughts and beliefs in the coming months so stay tuned!