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Common Mistakes Christians Make When Talking To Gay People

January 16, 2015

1910563_42399720812_4089_nFor my last post in this series of posts, I wanted to talk about some of the mistakes Christians make when talking to Gay people or anybody for that matter who is not saved.
Jesus said in John 13:35 that the world will know we are Christians by our love for one another. Today it seems that the world knows we are Christians by what we stand against, so it’s no surprise why no one wants be a Christian anymore. Some Christians are seriously misrepresenting God in the world today. People already feel like God is only a tyrant who wants to make our lives miserable, but we need to show them the truth. I’m not saying you can’t have an opinion or stand up for our beliefs. What I am saying is we need to be showing more love, because right now most people only see anger, hatred & judgment.
Some Christians seem to feel that they need to share their view that homosexuality is a sin whenever they meet or are talking to gay people. Here’s a tip. The moment you say you are a Christian, they’ll know how you feel about homosexuality. You don’t need to say it. What they really want to know is if you take the Bible seriously and if you will love them. Many gay people have only known rejection when it comes to Church.
Some Christians feel like they are compromising or condoning gay people’s lifestyle if they don’t say anything about it. Even I have had to fight that feeling at times. We’re making the classic mistake of trying to win an argument of who is right and who is wrong, rather then loving the person. That persons sex life is really none of anybody’s business. It is between them and Go and it is our place to love them and show them how much God loves them. No one wants their “sin” thrown in their faces. No one. I seriously doubt that has ever brought about any fruit. What that actually does is lets that person know to never discuss anything that with you again.
Once I was talking to a guy that I had just met and I am not sure how it came up, but I ended up telling him that I lived with 2 women. He immediately assumed that I was having a sexual relationship with them and proceeded to point out the error of my ways. I was pretty upset because it was none of his business and he didn’t have all the facts.
Here’s another tip. You have to earn the persons respect before you have the right to speak into their life. They need to know you are a safe person that they can open up to and that you won’t judge them.
I have some openly gay friends that know my stance and I know theirs. We don’t agree on the issue but we are able to remain friends because of our mutual love and respect for one another. From time to time we talk about it but it doesn’t cause an issue. I pray that God will show them to truth. If I’m constantly pointing out that I think they are living in sin, that door will close.
In all our relationships, we need to pray for people and allow God to bring the revelation. Only God can change their heart and life and when that moment comes, they will remember you and remember that you didn’t judge them or condemn them. They may even come knocking because they saw your love and know you genuinely care for them.
We need to ask ourselves what is our motivation for sharing this stuff. If it is not out of love then you have no business doing it. If it is out of love, ask yourself how you would receive a word from someone if the tables were turned. Also ask God to open their hearts and let you know when the time is right to speak into their lives. It is about mutual love and respect. Also be open. I have learned some lessons myself from some of my non Christian friends & family.
I say that this is my last post in this series but I actually have one more so stay tuned.

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